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October 24, 2013

ImageDoes your friend make you feel like the wittiest, most fun, coolest person on earth? Do they make you feel like the ultimate solver of all their difficult problems? That they simply cannot cope without your help from one drama to the next. Do you feel like the most brilliant therapist in the world when your friend is in crisis? You often drop everything to help them and you are the one person who makes everything better.

Feeling so needed and so completely central to another person’s functioning can feel good at times. It can fulfill a need to be needed. A need some of us didn’t know we had. You may think you hate being needed but you are still drawn in by this role for one reason or another. Difficult people can sniff out this type of vulnerability and they will likely seize the opportunity.

When a friend overvalues you, you are placed on a pedestal as long as you are doing everything right and give them what they need at all times. However, this can quickly change with one perceived slight and you will be shoved off the pedestal into the not so pleasant world of being devalued.

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